L a s t S u m m e r;

Monday, July 28, 2008

Welcome Back To The Rain

Hey all,
So,
We're all slowly trickling back to uni. If you're a Curtin Uni student, odds are on that you had to start uni with an 8 a.m. class Monday Morning sharp, and today is the....................................28th of July! Ok, so the fullstops were precisely how long it took me to get to that date. And I couldn't be buggered scrolling all the way down to the calendar option.
As we speak, I am progressively MELTING in the Canning College Library thingo, where all the computers are. Very strange, very very strange. It's like no one has invented thermostats in Canning :P
Oh, I remember when it was really cold, we used to come and camp out at the lounge .
So anyways, what was I on about? Erm, oh, yes. Well,
Welcome Back To Uni people! 6 weeks, gosh , what a long time. I feel sufficiently well-rested, although my eyes are tired because of my contacts drying up but other than that, everything's alright. :)
How were the holidays for you? Hope you're a bit more tanned than usual, and that you weren't spending the entire thing stuck in this little itty city we like to call Perth. God the weather has been a sight hasn't it?! It's been raining and raining and raining!!!! But it hasn't been too bad. I've gotten up to a lot of stuff since I last blogged.
Major Event No. 1 = MY BIRTHDAY! I am finally and absolutely legal! I am 18, I can now get alcohol at the bar without feeling bad, I can go clubbing without getting busted, it's allllllllllllll gooooooooodddddddddddddddd. My life has a new awesomness to it. =)
I'm trying to convince my parents to let me go clubbing, but I highly doubt they'll ever bend on that one =S
I had massive massive amounts of fun clubbing, btw. It was excellent.
Here's a list of the drinks I consumed over the two day period that was my b'day celebrations :
1. Midori Vodka
2. Vodka Lemon and Lime
3. Smirnoff Black
4. Jagerbombs
5. Fruit Tingles
6. Cocksuckin' cowboys
7. Bourbon
8. Jam doughnuts
9. This one drink that was sharp but I couldn't tell what it waS?
I LOVE THE PARAMOUNT AND THE SHED.
Excellent clubs, didn't mind the Deen. But I'm deffo heading back to the Paramount. =)
It was good, the lower level was mainly mainstream live music, the top was hardcore disco music, it was amazing, and I danced and drank and danced, and I did it all with one of my best mates, Bec and her bf Paul, as well as my darling Timmy. And then later one of my mates from Uni along with this other girl Tira came along, so did Casey. It was all alll allll allllllll FUN

tim and i of course cannot enjoy ourselves without having any hiccups along the way. On the first night, Friday, the 18th of July ( what are the odds that I celebrate my 18th on the 18th :P ) , Tim and I first went to the Shed then after half an hour, went to the Deen. And then, we were way way way too stingy to catch a cab back home, so.... WE STAYED IN THE 24 hours Maccas on Barrack/ Murray/hay ( was too navigationally-dysfunctional to tell which street it was) and we stayed in the EXTREMELY COLD WEATHER till about 7 a.m. then we caught a train then a bus back home and collapsed on the bed, slept till 5 p.m. then went out to the paramount. and saturday night was the shed paramount then we had to wait out till 6 before we caught a CAB! IN THE FREEZING COLD! IN A VERY VERY SKIMPY DRESS! I never wanna do that again! GAWD :P
But it was worth it, every second of it, was worth the cold. I swear to god. :P
I really hope I can go again, I really do. Mum, MEG! PLEAAAAAAASSSSSSSSEEEEEEEE

So, anyways, other than that, I mostly bummed around, went to the gym, watched movies off Tim's hard drive, all good fun. Oh, I've been watching back to back episodes of season 2 one tree hill ( OH GOD I HOPE DAN DIES ) and back to back eps of The OC ( Season 2 is almost done WHEEEEEEEEEEE I need moar!) and also I finished the first season of Sex and The City. WOOt.

So , good good life.
=)
xx

Labels: Clubbing, Happy Times, Life, Love, movies, Rantification and Randomity

xx signed off at 12:07 PM

Sunday, June 22, 2008

Like a Rollercoaster Ride

Hello hello hello ,
Yes, it is I , Netty Nut. It's that time of the year where I finally can blog without the guilt of potentially failing some major element of my education. Yes
It
Is
The
Holidays!!! Semester break = 6 weeks. I know, WTH?! Why have we been persecuted so long in high school with just a week here, a week there, a minute there, a millisecond in that little tiny corner between the teacher and the boy who smells like beef.
So, anyways, semester exams finished on Monday. This means I'm finished with 4 units! 4 ENTIRE UNITS. It's like, doing TEE for 4 subjects, but all in 6 months instead of 12. Give or take a few months, o'course. Tolerance = + or - 10%.
Yes, I included TOLERANCE. BITE ME I'm an engineer.
Well, at least, I hope I still am?!?! Those exams went.....hm..... yes.
Math and Electrical systems were fine, but Mechanics was quite honestly the most depressing exam I have written since Physics. Which brings me to another thought : I SUCKED AT PHYSICS BUT ENDED UP AS AN ENGINEER. Where's the karma kick there?

So, yes, there's one rant - Check!
My mind is so all over the place, blogging at midnight isn't conducive to any sense.
My dad's over here for 2 weeks, which basically means a BIG PAUSE BUTTON has been pressed on my social life, as I attempt to entertain my father in a desperate attempt to prove I really am a good daughter, and not just some bum he has reared whos slowly buggering away his hard-earned moolah and sleeping with everything that moves ( which i MOST EXPRESSLY DO NOT ).

So yes, been doing all sorts of things to that tune. Mostly sleeping in till late and then going for walks and getting some sun, as I need to grab as much Vitamin D as possible before the heavens open and rain comes pelting down like we're in the middle of a 9 month hurricane.
Yes, a 9 month hurricane. It's the baby of two monsoons who happen to be at the right place at the right time.
YEAH Mr. Monsoon + Ms. Monsoon = Hurricane.
God, my brain is sexy.
Anyways, what was I saying?
Oh yes, so I've been getting quite a bit of exercise and also recently have been doing a whole heap of fun things.
Went for half-price waffles on Tuesday at Gelare on Mends. Love it. Nothing quite like the taste of hot waffles, coated in quality maple syrup and delish whipped cream. It really is quite phenomenal, and at a stellar price.
I give this ----------**** stars.
Yes, I gave it 4 stars, problemo?

----------------------------------------------00000000000

Hmm, let me think, what else was I going to say?
Oh yes, I recently downloaded Coldplay's new album after falling in love with Violet Hill ( a song whose video clip quite truly does it no justice whatsoever ) and so Viva La Vida or Death and all his friends is now the new addition to my family of music. say hi chris martin! :)
The songs are good, they really are, but when you hear the entire album in one sitting, the songs kinda end up sounding the same. Individually, each track is its own charttopper, but in one amalgamated mix of music, it's sort of the same thing, the random BIG BAND chorus, the piano intervals, the beating of the drums, Chris Martin's signature voice. It's all terribly lovely, but terribly mundane. They've got a slightly more symphony-esque album this time around, and more echo-ism, and consistent beats throughout, unlike the earlier albums, which had this more acoustic tone . Out of 10, I'd give it.......erm.......8.34569349 X 10 ^ -1
Yeah, that exact.
The other albums are :
Paramore - Riot.
GOOD GOOD GOOD GOOD GOD! Their song Crushcrushcrush is fantasmic. I really love it. It has this edgy vengeful feel to it, and everyone loves a good vengeance song.
Which brings me to the other album I've downloaded.
Two girls called Aly and Aj, those of you from Brunei who watched TRL religiously must know them, they sang " Chemicals React " - ( you tube it, its well worth the watch). So, they have another song called Potential Breakup .
OMG
I LOVE IT
The vid is fantastic, these girls are hot as, and the music is just fabulush. I downloaded their albums instantly, sooooooooo goood.
So much sass, spunk.
I'll link lyrics.
http://www.metrolyrics.com/scroller/scroller2.swf?lyricid=2147447035&border=2&bordert=0&bgfont=0xC0C0C0&bg=http://www.metrolyrics.com/scroller/bgs/AlyAndAJ.jpg&filter=0x000000&filtert=25&txt=0xFFFFFF&fontname=arial&fontsize=11&speed=1" quality="high" width="180" height="210" name="scroll" align="middle" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" pluginspage="http://www.macromedia.com/go/getflashplayer" />
http://www.metrolyrics.com/Aly-AJ-lyrics.html">Aly & AJ Lyrics
http://www.metrolyrics.com/">Potential Break-up Song Lyrics
sexalicious!
So yes, love their tracks.

Another band that I've discussed before is red, they are quite quite awesome, I must say.
Anyways a song I recently heard of theirs

http://www.metrolyrics.com/scroller/scroller2.swf?lyricid=2147433578&border=2&bordert=80&bgfont=0xC0C0C0&bg=http://www.metrolyrics.com/scroller/bgpic/bluedisco.jpg&filter=0x000000&filtert=25&txt=0xFFFFFF&fontname=arial&fontsize=11&speed=2" quality="high" width="180" height="210" name="scroll" align="middle" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" pluginspage="http://www.macromedia.com/go/getflashplayer" />
http://www.metrolyrics.com/red-lyrics.html">Red Lyrics
http://www.metrolyrics.com/">Already Over Lyrics
It is quite beautiful. Listen to the album. It is fab.

-------------------000000000000000000000000000000000

On another note, I'm trying desperately to lose weight as usual, to the extent that meals skipping is now a compulsory issue.
However, where I am failing is snacking. I keep snacking.
Someone, come up with a solution for snacking!

I AM SO BRAINDEAD I CANNOT BLOG
NIGHT
xx
.

Labels: Rantification and Randomity

xx signed off at 12:29 AM

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

The Thing I Happen To Love For Some Reason

Ah,

Yes.....

Yes, it's true.

I'm BACK BABEH! Driven by a random need to distract myself from my studies ( which isn't altogether that impossible) I decided, ah, what the hell, might as well indulge in something that is as far away from engineering as possible. Blooogggggginnnnnnnngggggggg. It makes me feel like I'm doing a service to the community by having a piece of cyber-real-estate and actually making albeitly feeble ) attempt at trying to improve the property value.

And now, for something completely different.

Hello all, how's it doing, as my classmate Brendon says. I find that statement somewhat repulsive. How's it doing? I'm not an it. Nor is anyone I know an it.

Unless you count that spineless turd , the guy who screamed at me for about half an hour at work about how some random ran over his phone and he didn't have insurance but it was magically all my fault, simply because I was the sales representative.

Ah, the stories I could tell.

Lets see, first, what has happened to me since my last blog post. I do not know, because I haven't yet checked to see when my last post was. Ten bucks its some unfinished rant. * ctrl t's a new tab on the window and brings up random colours on screen with little scrawl going across*

Ah, right, the chrissie wish list.

Omg, it has been a while.

It will please you to know i got nothing that i wanted on my christmas list, but instead got things i liked that i happened to lack the imagination to include.

most presents were provided by Sir Hargreaves, the ever-present source of compassion, caring, and soul, not to mention absolute idiocy and cuteness all wrapped up in one random grass-munching puffball = My Boyfriend Timothy.

Now, let's see. What has happeneed since then?

Well, for one thing, I got a job.

Yes, I

Got

Job.

Don't act too bloody shocked that someone would want to hire me, you piece of monkey poo! ( note : all those who aren't shocked and are happy for me , disregard the monkey poo bit. think more...piece of pie? NICE PIE. Not dodgy australian pie. Note to self : have rant about aussie pie further in blog ) I got a job in a phone chain store thingy called Living Digital. Some of you may have phones from there, considering that 80% of the international student population inevitably ends up getting drawn in by the insanity of getting 150 bucks worth of credit for just 30 bucks ( btw, before you come to me asking why it's just 120, RTFM. )

[ RTFM : Read The F*ing Manual ]

So, where was I? Ah, yes, ( thank god for blogger's scroll up and down feature, otherwise I'd probably be discussing space monkeys or some crap like that by now, and here's the amazing thing, it's only the 5th paragraph. WOO HOO AREN'T WE EXCITED TO KNOW I WRITE NOVELS?) . So, anyways, I work in Living Digital, we sell phones, etc. It's

not too bad. I'm not that fabolous a salesperson, and yet I seem to do pretty well. I think it's because people are scared of me ? I am very loud, overbearing sort of person, ya know. Agreements, I hear.

Well, anyhow, i made a fair packet from that job, which is going to tide me well over this year, hopefully. It's going to be a pain doing tax returns hahaha.

Gosh, some of the people you meet at this job.

There's this one guy who comes into the Victoria Park store that I used to work in , and he either comes in shirtless with just shorts, and he's all sweaty and stinky and hairy and just a REALLY MASSIVE TUMOUR FOR THE SORE EYES, or he comes in with this cowboy hat and his motorola phone ( the 10th he's bought because he thought ( in his own words ) " it's a f*ing piece of f***. I'm being f*ed over by f*ing Optus who are f*ing f*ers. ). So yes, man who comes in. He's majorly aggressive, absolute bastard on two feet, starts ranting randomly about any shit.

Also, did I mention he has about 1000 $ of Porn on his phone.

PORN MY FRIENDS.

And he'll come in store and discuss it.

WTH

WE DON'T WANT TO KNOW GEEEEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZZZ

But yes, that's just one of the many colourful characters I've had the opportunity to come across with.

The usual clientele isn't too shabby. A bit of a talk this way and that, and they buy something on contract, though the outrights are the satisfying sells. And then you get the ABSOLUTE DICKHEADS 5 minutes before you're closing or 30 minutes before you're due to open, and they come in, kick up a fuss, and leave you in such a horrible mood for the rest of the day, that it doesn't matter if you sold a million phones per millisecond, you'd still feel like you did jack.

( Tim, I do not know a jack. I have not , as a result, done him )

Ah, well, que sera sera. Or something like that.

So anywho.

What has happened to me uni wise ? Well, I got a TER of 99.8 which is one of the highest TERs in Western Australia, so pretty stoked about that.

However, the funniest thing. I didn't receive any first round offers AT ALL. Like NO UNI WANTED ME . Wanna know why?

BECAUSE MY SURNAME IS A FULLSTOP. So this whole entire bunch of computers thinks, oh, wait, fullstops for surnames? That must be a fake name. NEXT.

So, get this, the deans of all the unis realise how badly they've screwed me over, and I get calls from them apologising profusely, and finally I get a full scholarship into Chemical Engineering ( double degree with Extractive Metallurgy) at Curtin Uni.

OH HOLY COW. I am in deep water here.

A person who has done bio all her life, and written ten page english essays suddenly has to figure out Thevenin's Equivalent. Google it, it's a piece of shit.

So, yes.

I am so out of my league, it's scary. And I need to maintain an 80% average to keep my scholarship . GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

I swear, I will eventually cave and swim in an ocean of craziness.

Amen.

What else has happened? Erm... let's see

Oh, yes, my parents finally found out about Tim. How you ask?

Good story this one. Widen thine eyes and open thine ears at appropriate moments. Cry, sob, sniffle, or just chortle.

It all starts with me, getting ready for training for my work at 6 a.m. I usually turn off my phone so that if and when my mum turns it on, she can't access the phone because of the sim password i put on it ( *nudge nudge wink wink *). However, on this particular occasion, I leave my phone on the dressing table, in plain sight, on. With about 53 saved messages from my bf in the inbox and it's all of him saying how much he misses me and loves me and the usual romantic stuff . I was saving all these ( because I usually delete them in the event of my phone getting into nosy hands ( A HAND WITH A NOSE ) ) because my bf was in Queensland for about 2 months and I missed him a tad, and so had these to remind me of his everlasting lunacy for me.

I come out of shower.

Mum sitting at dining table.

Mum staring at me as I drink tea in front of heater.

Mum : Net, what are those messages from Tim?

Net : What? EH?

Mum : Are you in love with him?

Net : Errrrrrrrrr No..............*shifty eyes* of course not!

Mum : Break up with him now.

Net : Gaaah, I need to go for work, I'll come back and talk.

My dad is sitting at the couch with this really pissed off disappointed look on his face as i walk out.

Uh Oh.

So, I go for work, and drop the news to Tim. Who's like. Shit.

And then I get back. BIG FAMILY MEETING. Mum and dad totally go off at me for doing this and saying how I've changed and become a girl with no morals and now I can't date till I get out of uni, and how is this going to make my sister look, if her younger sister is a little slut ( yes, slut ).

I started crying and I seriously thought that Tim and I were to be broken up.

However, Tim and I , it will pleease you to know, are now continuing an espionage relationship, under closed covers. It is sad, but true. :S

Hmm, so yes, that happened.

Also, I discovered that Marcus and Brendan had a bet going on who would swipe my virginity first. HAHAA GAYs didn't get the chance. Bunch of dweebs. They did the worst thing that I'm not even going to discuss. anyways..........

Erm, oh, yes...........

I'm trying to think of things to say but I run out now.

Oh, I'll get back to you lovelies.

NIGHTIES AND PANTIES

xx Nutty Netty

Labels: Iconisation, Life, Love, Rantification and Randomity, Work

xx signed off at 11:17 PM

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

You Burn Me

I just felt inspired to write poetry, I get this way when I have headaches.
I have been watching movie after movie continously for the last two days, it is starting to affect my mental health methinks.
Now, poetry :

Lost in You - Me

I don't understand anymore,
If this pain that I feel,
Is my heart behind a locked door,
And you threw away the key.

It sort of feels like I've been here before,
Like these tears are coming back to haunt me,
And I don't think I want to feel sore,
But sorrow's a probability.

And there's no piece of me left that you haven't shattered,
There's no love that you haven't sucked me dry of,
I've fallen at your feet, so many times, I'm battered,
And this emotion you've left me with, this undying love,
Is tearing me, into a million pieces of who,
I used to be,
And you've got me saying, I'm so sorry,
I'm just lost , so lost, in you.

You could call me names,
You could hit me across the face,
But somehow I come back to you, the treatment's always the same,
But in your arms, I find a better place.

I feel like I've been ripped in two,
I feel like nothing makes sense,
Like I'm just a part of who's standing in front of you,
And I can't say I love you in the past tense

No one understands, that who I am was who you made me out to be,
And now I'm too far gone, too far gone this cold, winding road to see,
That everything, everything I thought I was,
Was what I wanted to be for you,
And somehow, because,
I let myself get too lost in you.

I'm a broken soul,
Nothing of me is normal,
I will never again be whole,
I'll just hope to be free from your torment,
Because all I am,
All I wanted to be,
Was what you said,
What you said you thought you saw in me,
But I don't know,
I don't know what it is you thought you'd seen

Because I've tried so hard,
To be who you thought I should,
I've tried it all,
I did all that I could,

And just when I thought I'd lost everything I had before,
You said you were coming back ,
And now I see you there, walking back through my door,
You're like a sharp heart attack

sorry,
I said it's over,
You said forgive me,
I said I'm not sober,
You said you loved me,
Said you needed me,
What am I supposed to do,
Am i supposed to take you back just because I've lost myself in you?

----------00-000000000-0000000-000000000000-000000000000-000000000-00----

Another one i should think, before I hop in for a shower , ^_^

There's a soft little sound,
While I'm lying on your bed,
I'm trying to get my feet on the ground,
And trying to get you out of my head,

And you come back from your shower,
And stare at me naked on your sheets,
And you tell me to get up and go,
And our eyes meet.

Baby, how does it feel,
Knowing you can't control me,
How does it feel,
Knowing that you need me.
Oh why can't those glaring eyes see ,
That everytime you try to force me,
I tell you go screw yourself, go screw yourself, my baby.

So I'm telling all these voices,
That I should be letting go,
Of something that's hurting me inside,
Yes, I know,
That girl I saw you with last week,
She wasn't just a friend,
She and I, we got a chance to speak,
And all your dirty little secrets she did tell.

Was it not good enough for you,
All the nasty things I let you try,
All the places I let you take me to,
And for all the things you got off on that made me cry?

Time waits for no man,
So I'm going to have to speed things up,
Kill you the best way I can,
Because you're messing me up, messing up our love,

I saw you with her,
Her pretty little blonde head,
I hope you remember,
How she looked lying sprawled on your bed,
And I hope you said to her,
How much you loved her beautiful body
Because I've just done something,
Done something that amazes me,

I've made you regret,
I'm forcing you to respect,
I want you to forget,
That slut who put her hands down your pants, yes
And if you know me well enough,
You'll know I never give up,
Your luck has just run out, oh, isn't it tough?
I murdered your beautiful girlfriend.

xxooooooooooooxxxxxxxxxxxooooooooooooxxxxxxxxxxxooooooooooo
Ok, that one was a bit hmmmmm....
Lol, it was inspired by this movie, where this guy and girl like each other, and then purposely to screw with her feelings the guy cheats on her, with this hot chick, and the girl kills the chick.
MUCHO PSYCHO ^_^
Anyways, shower. Mwahz, love you all.
xx
Netty

Labels: Poetifulness, Rantification and Randomity

xx signed off at 3:03 PM

Saturday, November 10, 2007

GAY RIGHTS FOR GAYS

Lol, heyaz...
Erm, well, I need a valuable distraction so I've decided to do a little thing on Gay Marriages, and gay rights in general.
I was having a heated discussion with my boyfriend about Gay People and How they should have the right to get married. Obviously, Tim disagreed, and he said, oh, it's just disgusting and ... it's like legalising someone marrying a goat!
Well, here's the thing...GAY People ARe Human Beings.
Get that?
I mean. Think about it, we're all born the same way, same hands, eyes, hair, voice, everything. We're given the same tools . What we do with it is up to us.
If it's illegal for gay people to get married, then it should be illegal for disabled people to get married.
If it's illegal for gay people to get married, then it should be illegal for potential murderers, potential rapists, potential postmen, potential policemen ( who are basically legal murderers if you think about it) to get married too.
It should be illegal for us to eat so much food when on the other end of the world children are dying of disease and starvation, and malnutrition.

But none of that is illegal.
People all over the world are allowed to walk hand in hand down the aisle and exchange their vows and be bound by the ties of matrimony.
Marriage is a beautiful thing, a wedding ceremony is the one thing someone plans for eight or nine years in advance sometimes. Every little girl dreams of getting married. So why should it be wrong for gay people to not have the same dreams?
We're allowed to enjoy this experience with no prejudice no shame, no one stopping us and saying , it's illegal for you to love one another and to want to be together for the rest of your lives. To have and to hold til death do us part. In sickness and in health.
And yet, for some strange unknown STUPID RELIGIOUS REASON , gay people can't share the happiness straight people share. For some strange reason , it's vile and disgusting, and putrid, and wrong, and morally and religiously decrepid for one man to love another, or for one woman to love another.
WHAT THE HELL!??!
How can this be right?
Love is not about religion, cast, race, creed, culture, hair colour, hairstyle, clothes, smiles, nothing.,
LOVE IS ABOUT EMOTION . It's about feelings, and passion, and romance, and having someone you want to share the rest of your life with. Someone to cuddle when it gets cold in the night. Someone to hold your hand when you need a friend. Someone to be there for you through the best times and through the worst times.
SO WHY THE HECK ARE GAY PEOPLE NOT ALLOWED TO WANT THIS FOR THEMSELVES?

If it's so disgusting for people of the same sex to love each other,then why is it not disgusting for people of different sexes to love each other?

Gay people are just like any one of us. They function in THE SAME WAY. They go to work, they work 9 to 5 hours, they perform all their tasks effectively and in an organised manner. They get things done just as well as any other average office worker.
They come home, they clean up the house, they cook food, they sit down and watch the telly. they may go out clubbing, they dance like normal people ( sort of =P). They dress up, a tad like us, though....you know, give or take a bit of the gayness haha.
GAY PEOPLE ARE JUST LIKE US
So
Why
Discriminate?
Why? They do some of the same things a man does to a woman, so why is it wrong?
They kiss.
We Kiss.
They hug.
We Hug.
They laugh.
We laugh.
How are they different at all?
It may make you uncomfortable to seee two men or two women kissing or touching or being intimate, but guess what, it's not going to change. THEY DON'T GIVE A SHIT. You can say what you want, you can chuck whatever they want, but those two people are in love and there's nothing that can destroy love if it's true.
SO F OFF and leave GAY PEOPLE ALONE.
^_^ END OF RANT

La la la...some iconsies! ^_^

Clickies on these icons, it's really good backup for my rant

And a songles and some HILARIOUS WHO'S LINE clips ahhaha
Listen to this song, it's maddeningly sweet on my phone ^_^

Oh, lyrics, lyrics, right

http://www.youtube.com/v/ki4zjTabJw0 that link too!! ^_^

Labels: Rantification and Randomity, Vids

xx signed off at 12:11 PM

Wednesday, August 1, 2007

What To Do When He Loves You

So...

I just felt like randomly typing and putting up more icons. It's an obsession, I know. It's sad, but yeah.

I found out today that Josh thought that David and I went out while Josh was here and we had already gotten together. And the truth is, I did, I was with David for just one night, but only because I felt sorry for him. David is a nice guy, but...

Apparently, Josh almost cried when one of the dudes he was with said, oh, David and Net went out, and blah blah. And he was upset because he kinda always suspected that maybe i didn't feel quite as intensely for him as he does for me. And now, when I'm finally getting to like him, he doesn't really believe me that much , because he's scared that I'm still pretending and i'm too afraid to hurt him or something.

Does this make sense?

I finally like him, and he's starting to question my feelings for him.

This is too complex.

Haha.

Erm...yeah...

So...

He's not really saying anything. But, you can sorta tell from the tone of his voice that he's kinda anxious to please.

I don't know.

I know in my last few posts I've been like, omg, I love him, etc.

but when I say love, i mean like a lot. But I don't LOVE him. Not the way he loves me.

Sigh....

I don't know.

You always want what you can't have, and I can have him. It's a case of...

Maybe I'm just scared of committing to one person? That's it. That's exactly it.

I am, by nature, a playgirl. And that's a bad bad bad bad bad thing to be.

Sigh...

Confused.

Whatever.

Anyways...

My everpresent problem is...

The Student Council River Cruise.

Do I go, and end up going alone?

Or stay at home and not bother wasting 25 bucks?

I guess the 2nd proposition sounds good.

I don't want to go with anyone from outside school really. I mean, not with people I know.

I wouldn't mind going if i had a date, but, we all know, that won't happen either.

So....

Yeah.

Depressed now.

Bye.

All Hail the Heart Breaker - The Spill Canvas

I had the notion that you'd make me change my ways

My bad habits would be gone in a matter of days

I had the feeling that you'd open up my eyes

To a whole new world that had since been in disguise

But that day will most likely never come for me

And it's just my luck to end up getting stuck to everything you are

So tonight I'll sit and pick apart your pictures

And overanalyze your words

But the truth is that

I've never fallen so hard

It's taken everything in me

Just to forget your sweater so far

I had the notion that you'd make me forget the world

But your undecisive mind shows me that you are "just another girl"

I had the feeling that those looks you gave me were real

What if I ripped your heart apart at the seams

Maybe then you'd know how I feel

But that day will most likely never come for me

And it's just my luck to end up getting stuck to everything you are

So tonight I'll sit and pick apart your pictures

And overanalyze your words

But the truth is that I've never fallen so hard

It's taken everything in me

Just to forget your sweater so far

I can honestly say that I never, ever, ever felt this way

Your lips, your eyelashes, your skin

These are the parts of your body that cause my comatose to begin

I can honestly say that I never, ever, ever felt this way

Your lips, your eyelashes, your skin

These are the parts of your body that cause my comatose to begin

I will sleep another day

I don't really need to anyway

What's the point when my dreams are infected with words you used to say

I will breathe in a moment

As long as I keep my distance

I wouldn't want to go messing anything up

So don't go worrying about me

It's not like I think about you constantly

So maybe I do, but that shouldn't affect your life anymore

I knew it the moment you walked into the door

So don't go worrying about me

It's not like I think about this constantly

So maybe I do, but that shouldn't affect your life anymore

I knew it the moment you walked into the door

I'll let you get the best of me

Because there's nothing else that I do well

I'll let you get the best of me

Because there's nothing else that I do well

I'll be the giver and you'll be the taker

I guess that's how this one's gonna go

I'll be the giver and you'll be the taker

You've got me down on my knees and I proclaim "All hail the heartbreaker"

------------------------> Josh just sent me this song. I had to update my blog just to put these lyrics in.

I think.

I don't know.

I don't love him. I'm sure.

Labels: Rantification and Randomity

xx signed off at 4:40 PM

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

I Was Losing Myself To Somebody Else

So...

Heyaz all ^_^

I felt like blogging again. I don't know why. Because I feel like putting up more icons.

I've had a fairly awesome day today, come to think of it, in spite of the rain and the general demeanour of the people in our college ( excluding my friends who consistently remain as hyper and pep... which , btw, I love, and I'm sooo glad I have perky friends. Life would suck without perkiness. If everyone was emo (refer to previous post hahahaha) then that would really really bite. And I mean chomp chomp chomp bite)

So, anyways, yeah....

Oh, I remember now what it was I wanted to write. I got back home today and checked my email. No, goofball, that's not the exciting bit.

Here's the exciting bit.

Josh sent me an email from Victoria, where he's gone, because he's the captain of his hockey team, and his hockey teams gone to Victoria for this finals game and for this prize presentation ceremony. And so I haven't seen him since sunday. Which is ok. it's been like two days. I can live.

He calls me all the time. In fact all the time haha...

And he texts me all the time.

Anyways, his email.

Erm, it was really sweet and really lovey dovey. that's why i'm documenting it.

Josh's Letter

Dear Nethra ( he calls me by my first name for some strange reason, he says its a pretty name, and it should be said more often ),

Just got up. We scored tons of points at the match, tq for asking, it was awesome. Kinda kept looking at the crowd, expecting you to be there screaming that high pitched scream of yours, and going, " Josh, Josh, Josh ", and getting everyone revved up. My mini-cheerleader ;). I miss you. I miss you tons. I kinda think about you every second of the day. It's weird. And it's complicating me.

See, I can't play the game straight anymore. I was supposed to be listening to the coach and he was saying, Josh, you're the skip, you need to do blah blah blah blah oh..I wonder if she's in school right now....Wish I could call her....haha, that text she sent last night was hilarious.....she's got such a pretty smile.... and then i get whacked across the top of my head by David or Gerry, who's that guy I introduced ya to at T's. And I come back to earth, from all my pretty little thoughts of you. God. Help me. I sound so mad. It's so odd, but i feel like i have to tell you all this. Like.. I need you to know. I need to tell someone. Davo and my other mates would probably crack up that I've gone nutso for you. But hey, you're worth getting laughed at, I reckon. What are you upto? Done anything special since i left? Send me pics of you. The ones on my phone aren't enough. I know, I sound obsessive, but if love's a crime, then i'm guilty.

I know I sound absolutely cheesy, and my cheese rating is really high. But come on, give me a break. I love you.I do love you. I realised that this morning when I got up. I had the sweetest dream. It was you and me just sitting at that park we went to, near your house. Just sitting there and kinda being close. and it was like, I just couldn't stop smiling, I could almost smell that perfume you said you wear only when you go out partying, that one that smells a bit like hershey's nuggets. I imagined the feeling of your hand and my hand and them together. I think I've read too many of my mom's romance novels, Ha Ha. I feel like flying back right now, and just pulling you close and kissing you, and doing all sorts of things, that i'd rather you didn't know about. I know how you feel about that. And it's ok. I understand. I'm not going to push you to do anything. I may not even turn out to be the one for you.But you're the one for me. I know that. I know it like I know that tomorrow's a Wednesday, I know it like I know that we won the finals tonight, I know it like I know that when I get back I'm going to tell you in person how much I love you.

I went out with the gang last night after the game, and we went clubbing. Couldn't dance with any chicks, because I just... I can't. It's like, I see another girl, and I'm like...she's nothing compared to my girl. You're my girl. You're.... you're perfection. even though you keep saying you're not. You are. You make my world so much better.

I just pushed the soppy limit. But I'm not afraid of you getting weirded out. I know you're not going to judge me.

What was I talking about? Ha Ha, something about being around you or thinking of you, makes me a bit like you, and how you tend to go off on a complete tangential line of thought. I think it's your absolute freedom of thought and your unrestricted vivaciousness that just.... It Fills Me.

I can't keep writing like this. I need to talk to you, I need to call you, my hands are way too twitchy, it's like, it keeps going to the mobile, and I keep looking at the clock and waiting for it to turn to 8, so that it's finally 5 for you. Stupid timezones. Same bloody country and.... yeah, sorry, I promised not to swear. I'm going to call you now. I love you.

Joshua.

I love how he writes. He's won loadsa prizes for writing and poetry and stuff, so he's a really good writer. And his mom used to write romance novels, but because she had to take care of Josh, she stopped writing, and she went into the MAJORLY RICH family business. Josh is rolling in it because of that.

I miss him too. I miss yaz, Josh, and you're not too soppy.

He called me right after that, and I was like, ahha, no, haven't got home yet. Oh, yeah, yeah, life's usual. And then I hung up and came home and read this.

Right, gotta go.

Some iconisation.

Some songs.

Think Twice - Eve 6
When all is said and done

And dead does he love you

The way that I do

Breathing in lighting

Tonight's for fighting

I feel the hurt so physical

Think twice before you touch my girl

Come around I'll let you feel the burn

Think twice before you touch my girl

Come around come around no more

Think twice before you touch my girl

Come around I'll let you feel the burn

Think twice before you touch my girl

Come around no more

She spreads her love

She burns me up

I can't let go

I can't get out

I've said enough

Enough by now

I can't let go

I can't get out

Wait till the day you finally see

I've been here waiting patiently

Crossing my fingers and my t's

She cried on my shoulder begging please

Think twice before you touch my girl

Come around I'll let you feel the burn

Think twice before you touch my girl

Come around come around no more

Think twice before you touch my girl

Come around I'll let you feel the burn

Think twice before you touch my girl

Come around no more

She spreads her love

She burns me up

I can't let go

I can't get out

I've said enough

Enough by now

I can't let go

I can't get out

What is it you really want

I'm tired of asking

You come wasted

When I showed up and he was there

I tried my best to grin and bear

And took the stairs but didn't stop at the street

And as we speak I'm going down

Cause she spread her love

And burnt me up

I can't let go

I can't get out

I've said enough

Enough by now

I can't let go

I can't get out

Think twice before you touch my girl

Come around I'll let you feel the burn

Think twice before you touch my girl

Come around come around no more

Think twice before you touch my girl

Come around I'll let you feel the burn

Think twice before you touch my girl

Come around no more

Download that Song. It's the BEST SONG IN THE WORLD for me at the moment. I'm just addicted to it. It's on constant replay. *dies*

Another song , kinda inspired by my friend May and her situation with her boyfriend. It's complex. but he wants her to change, and she can't:

Everything I'm Not - The Veronicas

Oh no don't go changing

That's what you told me from the start

Thought you were something different

That's when it all just fell apart

Like you're so perfect

And I can't measure up

But I'm not perfect

Just all messed up

I was losing myself to somebody else

But now I see

I don't wanna pretend so this is the end

Of you and me

Cause the girl that you want

She was tearing us apart

Cause she's everything, everything I'm not

It's not like I need somebody

Telling me where I should go at night

Don't worry you'll find somebody

Someone to tell how to live their life

Cause you're so perfect

And no one measures up

Yeah, all by yourself

You're all messed up

I was losing myself to somebody else

But now I see

I don't wanna pretend so this is the end

Of you and me

Cause the girl that you want

She was tearing us apart

Cause she's everything, everything

I'm not

Now wait a minute

Because of you

I never knew all the things that I have

Hey don't ya get it

I'm not going anywhere with you tonight

Cause this is my life

I was losing myself to somebody else

But now I see

I don't wanna pretend so this is the end

Of you and me

Cause the girl that you want

She was tearing us apart

Cause she's everything, everything I'm not

But now I see

I don't wanna pretend so this is the end

Of you and me

Cause the girl that you want

She was tearing us apart

Cause she's everything, everything

I'm not

[-------------------------------------Everything I'm Not -----------------------------------]

And some pics from my mobile phone, now that i've finally got it working ^_^

Labels: Rantification and Randomity

xx signed off at 7:09 PM

Monday, July 30, 2007

Lover I Don't Have To Love

So...

I've decided, I'm going start all my posts with so. It's a resolution. Yeeeuuppzzz.

Right, so...

Well, first on the agenda.
Vids that make me go hahahahahahahah allllll night long.
Eww.
You dirtyminded freak!
[url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q5im0Ssyyus[/url]
Chaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrlllllllllliiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeee

this song is mui addictive. and the vid is so full of draco malfoy. Hence...postage

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nuglkv8Aazg

Listen to the song. It's insanely luverleh.

So.........Erm...I feel like randomly putting up songs too.

"Lover I Don't Have To Love"

I picked you out
Of a crowd and talked to you
Said I liked your shoes
You said thanks can I follow you?

So it's up the stairs
And out of view
No prying eyes
I poured some wine
I asked your name you asked the time
Now it's two o'clock, the club is closed we're up the block
Your hands on me
I'm pressing hard against your jeans
Your tongue in my mouth
Trying to keep the words from coming out
You didn't care to know
Who else may have been you before

I want a lover I don't have to love
I want a girl who's too sad to give a fuck
Where's the kid with the chemicals?
I thought he said to meet me here but I'm not sure
I got the money if you got the time

You said it feels good
I said I'll give it a try
Then my mind went dark
We both forgot where your car was parked
Let's just take the train
I'll meet up with the band in the morning

Bad actors with bad habits
Some sad singers
They just play tragic
And the phone's ringing
And the van's leaving
Let's just keep touching
Let's just keep keep singing

I want a lover I don't have to love
I want a boy who's so drunk he doesn't talk
Where's the kid with the chemicals
I got a hunger and I can't seem to get full

I need some meaning I can memorize
The kind I have always seems to slip my mind
But you but you
You write such pretty words
But life's no story book
Love's an excuse to get hurt
And to hurt
"Do you like to hurt?"
"I do! I do!"
"Then hurt me." [fades]

------ By Bright Eyes

I love this song. for some strange reason.
It's very haunting, let's say.

I have a topic of discussion today.

EMOZ
And emos in general.

Let's start this off with a definition of emo:

Emo may describe emo music or a general emotional state (as in to "feel emo"). It is also, sometimes pejoratively, used to identify someone fitting a particular emo stereotype or category, or of being overly-emotional.
Music

The term emo originated in the 1980s to describe a genre of music stemming from the emotional punk scene in Washington, D.C. Early bands labeled emo (or sometimes emocore, short for emotional hardcore) in this scene included Rites of Spring and Embrace. The term emo as a music genre has become more broad over time and now is loosely understood to define rock music with emotionally-based lyrics or effect. It is used to describe a broad, poorly defined group of bands that might include nearly any popular (or unpopular) rock band. Arguable examples of bands labeled as such are Hawthorne Heights, Innovator, AFI and My Chemical Romance.

Personality
When referring to a person's personality and attitude, most definitions of emo hold that an emo person is emotionally candid, sensitive, shy, introverted, glum, and quiet.[6] Depression and broken-heartedness are sometimes used to describe the emo personality. The factuality of broken-heartedness as a personality trait stems from the opinion that emo music contains multiple references to unrequited love, emotional and relationship problems.

Poetry

Emo personality is also often connected with writing poetry that addresses: confusion, depression, loneliness, the futility of life, and anger, all resulting from the world's inability to understand the author. Emo poetry usually combines a highly emotional tone and stream of consciousness writing with a simple (ABAB) or nonexistent rhyme scheme, references to the flesh (especially the heart), heavy use of macabre or depressing adjectives, and concern over the mutability of time, love, or both. A common theme is the author's feeling of emotional pain, or how misunderstood the author feels.

Fashion

By almost all current definitions, Emo clothing is characterized by tight jeans on males and females alike, long fringe (bangs) brushed to one side of the face or over one or both eyes, dyed black, straightened hair, tight t-shirts which often bear the names of rock bands (or other designed shirts), studded belts, belt buckles, canvas sneakers or skate shoes or other black shoes (often old and beaten up) and, if they wear glasses, they will often be thick, black horn-rimmed glasses Emo fashion has changed with time; early trends included haircuts similar to those worn by the Romulans and Vulcans in Star Trek, tightly fitting sweaters, button-down shirts, and work jackets (often called
Members of the emo subculture are portrayed as melodramatic, self-pitying teenagers who pour their efforts into writing depressing poetry. The current emo subculture has been called a "sad caricature" of what it once was.Some have accused emo of celebrating self-injury or suicide, which those who do usually refer to "helping ease the pain". However, physical trauma triggers the release of beta-endorphins, which enhances relaxation and reduces physical pain. Some assert that within some emo circles, many pretend to be suicidal and self-harming as a way to gain acceptance, regardless of whether it is true or not.

So yup, that is emo. I don't know what i feel for emos.

they're just so...
emo. It's like, more of a " oh wow, my life sucks, it really does" sort of thing that gets to me? Seriously. It's disturbing.
Anyways..... Erm...........
Well, so as you can see, I like putting icons in my posts nowadays. It's true.
I'm an iconator , hahahaha
^_^

Labels: Rantification and Randomity

xx signed off at 7:11 PM